Body hair is something we’ve all got, the girls, the guys, the gays and the theys. Most people can remember getting their first pubic hair: sometimes it comes with a sense of pride, but for others it brings shame. Then for the lucky few, it comes in the other parts, perhaps parts that you wouldn’t ‘traditionally’ expect.
Charlotte Cook host of RNZ's new podcast series Hair and Loathing Photo: Robert Burrowes
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For me it grew on my toes, tummy and upper lip - and that’s just some of it. Thick black hairs sprouted all over me long before my 10th birthday. Try as I might, 16 years later, they aren’t going anywhere.
I’ve plucked, pulled, lasered and shaved, but stubbornly they return, just as vibrant as they were before.
This body hair came with a sense of shame, embarrassment and whakama. It shouldn’t be there, I had learned. Body hair was wrong, ugly, and unfeminine.
As a teenager I was bullied by boys because of my moustache - likely because it was more impressive than theirs. You’d never catch me in a bikini or jandals. And NEVER mind even considering a bit of hanky-panky, because who could possibly love a woman with a snail trail. I carried the shame like a cloak - always looking for the best way to keep it hidden, a secret that I had body hair.
But I’m not alone.
Being ‘fuzz free’ conforms to at least a century of beauty standards for women, so is it really any wonder why we tend to look down at ourselves with disgust?
In this four part series, I talk to the experts who’ve looked at the trends and the women who’ve adhered to them.
A study by Virginia Braun, a Professor of psychology and gender studies, said women have been "told and sold" for decades that they should do everything possible to keep “unsightly” hair out of public view and certainly not have it on display.
She breaks down everything from whether the move to prepubescent looking Brazilians is actually a bit creepy to what way the population of New Zealand most commonly wear their short and curlies, or lack of.
Because the topic isn’t personal enough already, I talked to my own mother, Michelle Callum, who admitted she’d spent an absurd amount of time dealing to her ‘hairy bits.’
“I’ve worked out that I’ve spent 32,000 hours plucking in my lifetime,” she tells me.
Oh, and that’s only on her face!
In this podcast I also look at how body hair impacts intimacy and the prickliness you can feel about seduction.
TVNZ Journalist Mava Enoka even swore off sex as a teenager because she was so worried about how men might perceive her.
“It was always difficult in relationships, I felt so self-conscious about it.”
And amongst the beauty standards and social conditioning there is also the added complication of health conditions and hormones which make you grow more hair.
For transwomen dealing with an abundance of male hormones, there are also concerns.
Tris Egar is one of those women. She’s spent thousands and thousands of dollars trying to reach that unattainable ‘feminine beauty standard’.
“One of the interesting things that I’ve discovered from transitioning but that I think every woman knows, is that it’s expensive to be a woman.”
Tris says in order to reach the same level of professionalism as a male colleague, the standards women are expected to meet are much more expensive.
Cultural relationships with body hair also means some women, or in this case, children - whip off any of their downstairs hair before puberty.
Muslim beautician, Regina Bratoeva had her first Brazilian wax before the age of 12.
“There is an understanding that if you wax early you will destroy the follicle and it will not grow, so mothers are seen to be doing a favour for their daughters.”
These are just some of the topics I discuss in RNZ podcast Hair and Loathing.
Hair and Loathing will make you laugh, cry and maybe grimace. All the more reason to listen to the series.
Follow Hair and Loathing on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, iHeart Radio, Google Podcasts, Stitcher or wherever you listen to podcasts
